Immediately dropping the first intriguing ball setup by the final moments of the prior outing, H5 dismisses the “inherited evil” idea to slide into your standard slasher sequel. It also foolishly kills off the immensely likable Rachel for a cheap pop and transforms the lovably kooky Dr. Loomis of Part 4 into a dangerous lunatic. But it’s not all bad, she may be mute but Daniel Harris is still excellent as Jamie and (I know plenty of people may disagree with me on this) delivers up one of horror’s most likable leads in Wendy Foxworth’s hyper eighties-infused Tina. You probably hate her but Raymond Paul Leslie agrees with me so go fuck yourself. Anyways, Myers has been in another convenient coma for a year after getting his ass handily gunned down. He’s found by some homeless dude who takes him in and nurses him for the year he’s out. His kindness is repaid by getting murdered when Michael wakes up. It’s back to Haddonfield to track down and murder his now almost completely silent (and not homicidal) niece who he has a psychic connection to. Jamie gets flashes of Michael’s misdeeds and has conniptions to go along with them. There’s two bumbling cops who (I think) are supposed to be comic relief but the addition of slide whistle theme music to their scenes has me thinking they were never meant to be funny or were created by an elderly producer who was functioning at Vince McMahon levels of incompetence when it comes to what an audience would laugh at. It also introduces the Mark of Thorn nonsense to proceedings which I’ll speak on more when I finally get to rewatching the next outing. Throw in a ridiculous Myers house interior, some really unlikable/forgettable elderly teens (which, I guess, could also go in the benefits section), performances that one could politely call melodramatic and a mask that just keeps looking worse and there’s plenty to complain about. But we also get a bunch of time with Donald Pleasance (even if he’s way more of an asshole this time out), an incredibly tense (and admittedly implausible) moment inside some ductwork and a whole lotta Tina just doing her thing like she’s performing in some music video for a pop song that landed five years earlier. I’m not complaining. It’s fine. Things were about to get much worse… or better if you like some real garbage.
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