A friendly but undoubtedly creepy museum owner invites a freelance reporter and her two friends/co-workers to stay at his house when the hotels and motels in the area are all booked for the local holiday parade. There’s more wrong than just a shady Sydney Lassick creepin’ on three lovely ladies, there is something awful lurking in the basement of the large farmhouse. This something has been cared for by Ernest and his awkward wife Virginia for the last twenty years and with all the excitement, it gets out and gets violent. Barbara Bach’s shitty ex shows up uninvited and looking to reconcile, one of their number goes missing while they’re out filming the festivities, another one bites it when she spills a fruit bowl and something grabs ahold of her scarf while she’s cleaning up and we learn the not-so-shocking secret of what’s lurking around the house, snatching people up through the vents. Mr. Lassick is wonderful at chewing the scenery, there’s a solid turn from Lelia Goldoni as the mentally troubled Virginia and the family history is the right level of icky but it never goes far enough. It’s oddball, so I still enjoyed it but it just feels a little too muted for its own good. Bach seems like she doesn’t really want to be there and the cutest lady dies first but it does get accidentally goofy when it shows it’s cards, and I can’t be mad at that.
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