The School in the Woods (2010) (USA)

⭐️⭐️1/2

In the backwoods of Louisiana, an infamous abandoned school stands. Rich with dark history, some of it predating the building itself, the place is one of those structures best left alone. Thank the dark lords of dead idiots for college kids and school projects. A group of students venture out to the spooky place to find evidence of the paranormal and they do, to the detriment of all the living dopes looking to garner some high marks in their parapsychology course. Extended opening credits suck out any enthusiasm the audience may have had for an undiscovered found footage classic and gives one the queasy feeling that this bad boy is hard to find for the right reason. Some southern rock that’s pretty much butt blares over photographs of desolation, buildings and casting photos of the actors. We meet our arguing college kids immediately in a cramped van as they bicker and piss and moan. I’m still not sure if this is supposed to be found footage. It’s shot like it but they haven’t mentioned the cameraman, so it just may be this off-putting, incredibly amateur style of shooting. Six unlikable characters and a really noticeable way of filming… oh no. The decaying building is cool and I like that it’s shot in black and white but the personal drama being handled by a group of hopeful horror fans who got their hands on a sweet filming location ain’t all that convincing. At about the thirty minute mark it switches to the familiar found footage style which brings in color (briefly) and night vision… and also split-screen. Why? I don’t know, but it’s different enough to have me take notice. It changes back to black and white after a stretch with some washed-out film thrown in for good measure. Unsettling graffiti is discovered, noises are a-clangin’, child voices beg for help and tiny specters are not all that shy about making an appearance but there may also be something of a deeper malignancy hanging around. Two locals (a rude dickhead and his pleasant gal) show up after they hit a “deer” but with one of the group vanished and panicked, the kids begin to think the worst. Especially when the female local claims the “deer” was on two feet and dancing around. Oh. She also happens to be a practicing witch or psychic or something and definitely feels a presence in the building… not that we really needed her confirmation but it does set up a séance and an explanation of how the school is evil. Again, I don’t think we really needed her confirmation. Horrifying visions of a torturous ritual from the past play out like something you’d see in an underfunded haunted house at your local Baptist church, the redneck dickhead brings a gun into things and death is waiting thanks to the evil influence of the school. Once you acclimate to its rhythm, it transforms from an eye-rolling amateur spooker into something I slightly respect. The first thirty minutes are a tough patch to get through but if you do stick around long enough to let this flick’s odd tone wash over you, it’s a pretty good time.