Endless fracking in its territory sends a big-ass grizzly bear into a small town during a nasty blizzard. Bad news for the townspeople who seem pretty adept at getting mauled by a giant bear. Minnesotans speak at a volume like they’re in a library run by a Nazi librarian and look either miserably cold or like their knee pain is acting up… needless to say, I sympathized with the lot of them. The question remains as the corpses of animals and people show up: “If it is a bear, why the hell isn’t it hibernating and why the hell is it just discarding its kills?” The weather gets worse, the temperature drops and the bear savages more dopes. There’s a romance angle between two cops which has the erotic chemistry of an asexual woman and her gay roommate Kevin to fill the time in between the bear attacks that the film’s budget doesn’t really allow for. Don’t worry though, they hide it with awkward editing, slow motion and still photography accompanied by dramatic music. Not tempting enough? How about a script that I’m guessing was a title page followed by a note that said “I don’t know. Talk?” Everyone apparently owns the same shotgun, which they grab as soon as they walk outside to investigate growling and then are found dead the next day. Maybe it gets inherited by everyone? I’m not sure how things are done in tiny Minnesota towns. Digital snow somehow looks less impressive than the poorly rendered grizzly but neither of them hold a candle to the bear expert when it comes to lacking credibility. A whole bunch of chatter that doesn’t feel scripted and is delivered with nothing close to anything approaching emotion is almost all this thing offers. On the plus side, the shitty bear attacks may not grace our presence that often but they are my kind of trash and had me grinning like an idiot and director/writer Richard Douglas Jensen is so damn likable as the agitated sheriff that I was rooting for him the whole time… even if he writes himself to hook up with the hawt grizzly bear expert. Still; it’s like a dream birthed by the world’s most boring person who happens to be in a coma, really misses their Midwestern hometown during winter and is kinda terrified of bears. Listen, I give these no-budget things a bunch of leeway because I love the fact that they exist even though they feel like they should be hidden in an attic somewhere, waiting to be discovered when mourning family is cleaning out their dearly departed’s junk. I know it’s not anything that should be considered “classically watchable” but I’m still here smiling like I’m looking at a breakfast table where all my friends and family are sitting down together for the first time in years.
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