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Roberto “Flaco” Guzman stars as a head park ranger with his hands full when a heavy-breathing killer begins doing whatever it is heavy-breathing killers do. Things go from shit to shit-storm when his nephew gets lost in the woods while playing a game of hide and seek with his grandma. Worsening the situation, a trio of drug-fueled criminals begin to terrorize the park. There’s a solid hour of nothing and even when something happens, we spend very little time with the mouth-breathing madman. There are mucho mustaches and a few moments of blissful stupidity but it’s a sadly dull experience all around. Sourced from a VHS with some tracking issues (joyous nostalgia punch!) and non-subtitled (you’re lucky you got the film at all), Panico en el Bosque is a sleep-inducing ride. It may have been hampered by my limited understanding of the Spanish language but I doubt the dialogue would have saved this film. I do love the afterthought of an ending, though.
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