Professor Humberto “El Maestro” Valdez is fired from his Chicano Studies position at the local college. He deals with shitty students and shittier neighbors on a regular basis but the loss of his job gets him sent to a crappy shrink and that quack puts a knife in the hands of a man who is attempting to deny a possible violence growing inside of him. The only student that gives a damn gifts him with a death mask she crafted in her art class and racism greets the poor guy at every turn. Knife + Mask x Environment = Slasher Time! Luckily, all the victims are garbage humans (with a trio of murderous bigots being the worst of the bunch). There’s a sympathetic sheriff tracking the murders and a Cinco de Mayo party in the middle of the woods that can only end badly. It’s cheap, it’s crass and it fits comfortably with those late 80s and early 90s SOV films I love so much. Bonus points added for All Night Long segments that pop up at a few points during the film hosted by the super bubbly Stacy Monroe.
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Friday, May 8, 2026
Cinco De Mayo (2013) (USA)
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Professor Humberto “El Maestro” Valdez is fired from his Chicano Studies position at the local college. He deals with shitty students and shittier neighbors on a regular basis but the loss of his job gets him sent to a crappy shrink and that quack puts a knife in the hands of a man who is attempting to deny a possible violence growing inside of him. The only student that gives a damn gifts him with a death mask she crafted in her art class and racism greets the poor guy at every turn. Knife + Mask x Environment = Slasher Time! Luckily, all the victims are garbage humans (with a trio of murderous bigots being the worst of the bunch). There’s a sympathetic sheriff tracking the murders and a Cinco de Mayo party in the middle of the woods that can only end badly. It’s cheap, it’s crass and it fits comfortably with those late 80s and early 90s SOV films I love so much. Bonus points added for All Night Long segments that pop up at a few points during the film hosted by the super bubbly Stacy Monroe.
Professor Humberto “El Maestro” Valdez is fired from his Chicano Studies position at the local college. He deals with shitty students and shittier neighbors on a regular basis but the loss of his job gets him sent to a crappy shrink and that quack puts a knife in the hands of a man who is attempting to deny a possible violence growing inside of him. The only student that gives a damn gifts him with a death mask she crafted in her art class and racism greets the poor guy at every turn. Knife + Mask x Environment = Slasher Time! Luckily, all the victims are garbage humans (with a trio of murderous bigots being the worst of the bunch). There’s a sympathetic sheriff tracking the murders and a Cinco de Mayo party in the middle of the woods that can only end badly. It’s cheap, it’s crass and it fits comfortably with those late 80s and early 90s SOV films I love so much. Bonus points added for All Night Long segments that pop up at a few points during the film hosted by the super bubbly Stacy Monroe.
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