Celebrating a birthday and working on some strained relationships has a family camping in some lovely English wilderness. A pre-credits binding ritual in an abandoned building nearby has unleashed something called The Shimian. Ya see, the attempt to trap an old family curse failed and now our likable family (papa, teen daughter Emma, her best friend Claire and the new woman in dad’s life Sarah) has to deal with something they had no hand in bringing about. Emma ain’t a fan of Sarah because she doesn’t want anyone replacing her dead mother and worries about abandonment but it’s the right kind of sarcasm masking legit fears birthed from her father’s downward spiral thanks to depression and Sophie Simmons has enough natural charm to make her teenage character feel legit instead of a caricature of teen angst. It also helps that Margot Lin works as a perfect counterweight as her supportive bestie. While Ashlea Winfield’s Sarah works so well because she understands where Emma’s coming from and tries her damndest to bond without coming across like a naive dink. Rounding out the small cast is Blake Hutchings as the father, Tony, who is believably just trying to juggle the family drama and the unprecedented predicament they end up in. I know I usually don’t dive too deep into casts outside of “Hey! Paul Naschy!” or “Oh my Lordy, it’s Queen Shepis!” with the occasional “Why isn’t Chrissie Wunna in this?” but when a budget is this thin and performances make or break a production, it’s always good to show some respect to the performers who make it way easier to watch. Anyways, Sarah encounters the occult specialist we saw in the opening just staring at her while she pees, looking the worse for wear. It rightfully freaks her out but Tony calms her down and they carry on. Around the campfire Claire tells a ghost story about the area which ties into that opening scene and some strange growls from the darkness raises concerns. They intelligently decide not to investigate and hit the sack instead. Something creeps around the tents during the night and causes minor destruction which freaks Emma out and she doesn’t believe it’s an animal. The group tries hiking out but they get lost (through possible supernatural tomfoolery) and they run into that pee-watchin’ bloke who looks like me a couple of pints in, he just wanders off without saying anything… just like me a couple of pints in. Frustration and stress has the likeliest of candidates getting testy with each other and they are forced to spend another night where they don’t want to. Drunk me attacks and the team flees to the abandoned building from the opening. Luckily, Claire’s knowledge of folklore has her pinpointing just what’s after them. Convenient. Unfortunately, the likable character traits fall apart as bickering brings everything to a head and annoyance prevails. They split up to look around allowing Sarah and Emma to have a heart to heart before running into trouble. Epic music plays where it really shouldn’t, Tony quotes Arthur Brown which is a good way to endear yourself to me, a piano plays itself, stupid choices are made and a Halloween shop creeper shows up to take some lives. It’s foray into characters turning on each other is thankfully brief and the constraints of the budget are noted in just how much it can show but they did their damndest with what they had and it’s way better than a good amount of the sludge that makes it out into the world with no damn heart.
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Tuesday, September 15, 2026
The Shimian (2022) (UK)
⭐️⭐️⭐️
Celebrating a birthday and working on some strained relationships has a family camping in some lovely English wilderness. A pre-credits binding ritual in an abandoned building nearby has unleashed something called The Shimian. Ya see, the attempt to trap an old family curse failed and now our likable family (papa, teen daughter Emma, her best friend Claire and the new woman in dad’s life Sarah) has to deal with something they had no hand in bringing about. Emma ain’t a fan of Sarah because she doesn’t want anyone replacing her dead mother and worries about abandonment but it’s the right kind of sarcasm masking legit fears birthed from her father’s downward spiral thanks to depression and Sophie Simmons has enough natural charm to make her teenage character feel legit instead of a caricature of teen angst. It also helps that Margot Lin works as a perfect counterweight as her supportive bestie. While Ashlea Winfield’s Sarah works so well because she understands where Emma’s coming from and tries her damndest to bond without coming across like a naive dink. Rounding out the small cast is Blake Hutchings as the father, Tony, who is believably just trying to juggle the family drama and the unprecedented predicament they end up in. I know I usually don’t dive too deep into casts outside of “Hey! Paul Naschy!” or “Oh my Lordy, it’s Queen Shepis!” with the occasional “Why isn’t Chrissie Wunna in this?” but when a budget is this thin and performances make or break a production, it’s always good to show some respect to the performers who make it way easier to watch. Anyways, Sarah encounters the occult specialist we saw in the opening just staring at her while she pees, looking the worse for wear. It rightfully freaks her out but Tony calms her down and they carry on. Around the campfire Claire tells a ghost story about the area which ties into that opening scene and some strange growls from the darkness raises concerns. They intelligently decide not to investigate and hit the sack instead. Something creeps around the tents during the night and causes minor destruction which freaks Emma out and she doesn’t believe it’s an animal. The group tries hiking out but they get lost (through possible supernatural tomfoolery) and they run into that pee-watchin’ bloke who looks like me a couple of pints in, he just wanders off without saying anything… just like me a couple of pints in. Frustration and stress has the likeliest of candidates getting testy with each other and they are forced to spend another night where they don’t want to. Drunk me attacks and the team flees to the abandoned building from the opening. Luckily, Claire’s knowledge of folklore has her pinpointing just what’s after them. Convenient. Unfortunately, the likable character traits fall apart as bickering brings everything to a head and annoyance prevails. They split up to look around allowing Sarah and Emma to have a heart to heart before running into trouble. Epic music plays where it really shouldn’t, Tony quotes Arthur Brown which is a good way to endear yourself to me, a piano plays itself, stupid choices are made and a Halloween shop creeper shows up to take some lives. It’s foray into characters turning on each other is thankfully brief and the constraints of the budget are noted in just how much it can show but they did their damndest with what they had and it’s way better than a good amount of the sludge that makes it out into the world with no damn heart.
Celebrating a birthday and working on some strained relationships has a family camping in some lovely English wilderness. A pre-credits binding ritual in an abandoned building nearby has unleashed something called The Shimian. Ya see, the attempt to trap an old family curse failed and now our likable family (papa, teen daughter Emma, her best friend Claire and the new woman in dad’s life Sarah) has to deal with something they had no hand in bringing about. Emma ain’t a fan of Sarah because she doesn’t want anyone replacing her dead mother and worries about abandonment but it’s the right kind of sarcasm masking legit fears birthed from her father’s downward spiral thanks to depression and Sophie Simmons has enough natural charm to make her teenage character feel legit instead of a caricature of teen angst. It also helps that Margot Lin works as a perfect counterweight as her supportive bestie. While Ashlea Winfield’s Sarah works so well because she understands where Emma’s coming from and tries her damndest to bond without coming across like a naive dink. Rounding out the small cast is Blake Hutchings as the father, Tony, who is believably just trying to juggle the family drama and the unprecedented predicament they end up in. I know I usually don’t dive too deep into casts outside of “Hey! Paul Naschy!” or “Oh my Lordy, it’s Queen Shepis!” with the occasional “Why isn’t Chrissie Wunna in this?” but when a budget is this thin and performances make or break a production, it’s always good to show some respect to the performers who make it way easier to watch. Anyways, Sarah encounters the occult specialist we saw in the opening just staring at her while she pees, looking the worse for wear. It rightfully freaks her out but Tony calms her down and they carry on. Around the campfire Claire tells a ghost story about the area which ties into that opening scene and some strange growls from the darkness raises concerns. They intelligently decide not to investigate and hit the sack instead. Something creeps around the tents during the night and causes minor destruction which freaks Emma out and she doesn’t believe it’s an animal. The group tries hiking out but they get lost (through possible supernatural tomfoolery) and they run into that pee-watchin’ bloke who looks like me a couple of pints in, he just wanders off without saying anything… just like me a couple of pints in. Frustration and stress has the likeliest of candidates getting testy with each other and they are forced to spend another night where they don’t want to. Drunk me attacks and the team flees to the abandoned building from the opening. Luckily, Claire’s knowledge of folklore has her pinpointing just what’s after them. Convenient. Unfortunately, the likable character traits fall apart as bickering brings everything to a head and annoyance prevails. They split up to look around allowing Sarah and Emma to have a heart to heart before running into trouble. Epic music plays where it really shouldn’t, Tony quotes Arthur Brown which is a good way to endear yourself to me, a piano plays itself, stupid choices are made and a Halloween shop creeper shows up to take some lives. It’s foray into characters turning on each other is thankfully brief and the constraints of the budget are noted in just how much it can show but they did their damndest with what they had and it’s way better than a good amount of the sludge that makes it out into the world with no damn heart.
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