⭐️⭐️1/2
A spring break trip to a ski-resort has more trouble than broken limbs and pointy nips, apparently some Native American spirit summoned snow sharks long ago as a means for vengeance. Reawakening after a combination of intentionally triggered avalanches and accidental impalement… it happens! Now yesteryear’s problem has become today’s catastrophe and a ragtag group of heroes must team up to save their asses from gettin’ eaten by apex predator mountain fish thanks to those in power being the usual pieces of shit. A laid-back sheriff has to get his ass into gear as poor fucks keep on vanishing, eaten by the shimmerin’ snow sharks or ice sharks or whatever the hell they are. His wife had an encounter with the beasts decades ago and is still trying to prove their existence. There’s also a panicking mountain man with an awesome husky who knows about them-there snow sharks or ice sharks or whatever, the lazy head-of-the-ski-patrol/douchebag who can’t be bothered to do his damn job and a scuzzy resort owner who refuses to treat anything as seriously as he should. There’s shots of slow motion skiing, slow motion snowmobiling and slow motion plowing (not in the fun way) to stretch that runtime out in between the people being introduced solely to get themselves eaten. There’s a bunch going on that really doesn’t matter and plenty of folks talking about things that somewhat matter but there’s also bikini babes being eaten by a ridiculous threat and said threat jumping out of the snow to snatch up skiers… so… win? Not gonna be mad at something where everyone that should get eaten, gets eaten… or at least badly injured.
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